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101 Re: Adult Thread on Tue Jun 26, 2012 5:27 pm

semi★kolon wrote:I invented a move a while ago; it's called "The Snow White"

You start off with consensual heterosexual sex in the missionary position and right when she's close to cumming you stop and pin her down and shout out "oh shit, it's the Seven Dwarves" and then a bunch of your friends come in and beat the shit out of her.

.


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102 Re: Adult Thread on Tue Jun 26, 2012 5:50 pm

Actualy, Dewmann, Im pretty sure a few of those are pretty common.....

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103 Re: Adult Thread on Tue Jun 26, 2012 6:28 pm

As long as the mustard dispenser is not common, I can go to sleep at night without crying uncontrollably.

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104 Re: Adult Thread on Tue Jun 26, 2012 6:29 pm

You know, the churning butter one isn't really that bad.

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105 Re: Adult Thread on Tue Jun 26, 2012 6:32 pm

Well yeah, but try suggesting giving your girlfriend a hot lunch, pasadena mudslide, or Nicaraguan crab sandwich.

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106 Re: Adult Thread on Tue Jun 26, 2012 6:41 pm

SQUIGGLES

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The 7th Wonder of the World
Semicolon signing up for the dirty sex conversation.

I don't think you'd go for hardcore coprophilia right away. You'd have to build it up with, like
"let's have sex on the toilet, baby, yeah" and then
"let's have sex while you go to the toilet, baby, yeah" and then
"shit on my stomach, baby, yeah" and THEN
"shit in my mouth, baby, yeah"

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107 Re: Adult Thread on Tue Jun 26, 2012 10:50 pm

Gorgro

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Glorious Leader
I imagine it must be even harder to find someone who's just as in to that as you are without a creepy craigslist ad. How would you even bring that up?

"Hey baby, don't you hate it when you're in the middle of sex and you suddenly need to pee? Well..."

Constipation must be like erectile dysfunction to these people. "I swear this never happened to me before!"

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108 Re: Adult Thread on Tue Jun 26, 2012 11:43 pm

Hollyღ

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Dove in the Moonlight
Gorgro you are like the stand up comedian of obscure sexual acts

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109 Re: Adult Thread on Wed Jun 27, 2012 12:03 am

SQUIGGLES

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The 7th Wonder of the World
Gorgro Seinfeld

"Have you heard about this new thing going around? 'The Clap'? I don't know why people are clapping about it; it should be called 'the Ooze'."

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110 Re: Adult Thread on Wed Jun 27, 2012 5:47 am

At some point you think some of these were made up on the spot due to some bar bet

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111 Re: Adult Thread on Wed Jun 27, 2012 5:50 am

Gorgro

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Glorious Leader
Rare ♥ wrote:Gorgro you are like the stand up comedian of obscure sexual acts
It's good to have something to fall back on in case this whole programming thing doesn't work out.

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112 Re: Adult Thread on Wed Jun 27, 2012 8:32 am

Fun fact: If you take a woman's stank stream and put it in a toilet along with a man's paternal coolwhip, and then stir it around with his Betty Crocker fuckmuscle before closing the lid, then three days later a fucking baby will crawl out.

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113 Re: Adult Thread on Wed Jun 27, 2012 8:37 am

I have to remember never to go on this thread again

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114 Re: Adult Thread on Wed Jun 27, 2012 10:50 am

Jonny

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Prince of the Squirtle Squad
Yeah, even I'm getting creeped out and I'm as open-minded as they come.

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115 Re: Adult Thread on Wed Jun 27, 2012 11:21 am

I, for one, think this is amazing and should continue.

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116 Re: Adult Thread on Wed Jun 27, 2012 11:26 am

Hollyღ

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Dove in the Moonlight
I'm going to have to condemn the thread if this continues

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117 Re: Adult Thread on Wed Jun 27, 2012 11:32 am

Gorgro

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Glorious Leader
I think I've found the reason why inanimate objects keep screaming obscenities at Dewmann.

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118 Re: Adult Thread on Wed Jun 27, 2012 11:42 am

My mind is filled with so much tasteless humor that Trey Parker and Matt Stone vomited after I todl them a joke.

And I owe most of it to these videos.

NSFWtacular.

Spoiler:












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119 Re: Adult Thread on Wed Jun 27, 2012 1:35 pm

This thread is raeptacular

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120 Re: Adult Thread on Thu Jun 28, 2012 9:05 am

Hollyღ

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Dove in the Moonlight
Dewmann wrote:My mind is filled with so much tasteless humor that Trey Parker and Matt Stone vomited after I todl them a joke.

And I owe most of it to these videos.

NSFWtacular.

Spoiler:














I....I don't know why I watched all of these.

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121 Re: Adult Thread on Thu Jun 28, 2012 10:47 am

You were nignorant before.

Now you are properly educated.

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122 Re: Adult Thread on Thu Jun 28, 2012 11:12 am

Hollyღ

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Dove in the Moonlight
Of all the motherfuckers I know, you the motherfuckiest.

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123 Re: Adult Thread on Thu Jun 28, 2012 11:15 am

Bitches be trippin if ya'll think I'll watch those punk ass vids

...am I cool and hip yet?

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124 Re: Adult Thread on Thu Jun 28, 2012 11:18 am

Nope Charles, you're still suffering from TCB.

Typical Cracker Behavior.

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125 Re: Adult Thread on Thu Jun 28, 2012 11:23 am

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